I see it. I see everything. With you and everyone else. Okay, maybe not everything, but you think I don’t pick up on the lies? The attention you try to give yourself? The illegitimate emotions and situations you put yourself into?

I am so done. Not with you, but with everyone like you. Why does hate and love have to be so close together? The hate is getting too strong though. Your unhappiness won’t forever make mine. I will conquer you. Through merit, yes. Through grades, yes. Through accomplishments? So far, yes, and we will continue to see. Through friendships? That’s debatable. So success? We’ll see. I know that you will never be successful. I don’t know what you’re trying to do, but you’re not getting there. A large tree can’t stem without proper rooting. I have the strong roots. I know I do.

I was never Aphrodite. I will always be Artemis. The one that will kill you with one strike of a silver bow if you cross me the wrong way. That time is coming. In a metaphorical sense, of course.

What if the princess was fake? I’m not talking about Sleeping Beauty who had a curse on her and whatnot, but cinderella? What if she didn’t really slave away at her family’s orders? What if she had everything a girl could want, except she was a little attention whore? Would the princes still love her? Would she still get that gorgeous carriage? The beautiful gown? What if she lied about her entire life to get this stuff, and everyone believed it? Fake crying can only get someone so far…

People would much rather be ignorant than see things for what they are, right?

It’s a very odd thing to say, but this is one of the few times in my life where I actually feel successful. Yes, there’s the small uses to the word, but to actually accomplish something big, something doubtful.

1. I successfully completed the AP Euro test. How I did, however, I will never know. It makes me feel accomplished because I started studying a lot after the Wiz, which is not a lot of time at all. I guess I’m a decent crammer.

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It’s been a long while, yet again, since I’ve posted. I’m thinking, for a summer project type of thing, I could tweak some stuff here and there, make a new layout, and sha-zam! rebirth of this. Possibly.

Lately, I’ve been loving Jack’s Mannequin more and more… and it’s not because I finally got around to watching Dear Jack (Andrew McMahon’s documentary about his fight against leukemia). There’s a nice simplicity in his music, cryptic lyrics that I, as a listener, know there has to be thought into, and my own interpretations to the lyrics. I haven’t listened to all his songs, but I love a mixture from both albums. I recommend the songs Crashin’, Spinning, Swim, Drop Out — The So Unknown from The Glass Passenger, as well as Bruised, I’m Ready, and MFEO from Everything in Transit. It’s good stuff.

Okay, two more thoughts are circling my head right now, so sorry this is a long post. First – being put somewhat into the drama world (I’m in pit orchestra for The Wiz) is odd. I know very little people outside of the pit, and it makes me realize that there are so many little band-like worlds in our school. Well, maybe. I’m not exactly sure if the druggies of Costa are similar to the band geeks but whatever. This just makes me even more stoked for marching season. Yes, I am such a nerd. But the fun part is bringing new people into this circle. Not only does it sound like I’m in a cult, but meeting new people and becoming close to those are some things I really look forward too. You never know what the world may bring.

Point number two – I really need to look up that Bruce Almighty quote that Morgan Freeman says to Jim Carrey about people not knowing what they want, because it applies to me so much. I’ll want something to happen one day, then on the next day not care at all. I think it’s because I’m an extremely picky person — with foods (if you have ever been out to dinner or something with me you will know), friends (I’m not going to go specifics on this, but I become friends with everyone generally), guys (congratulations! someone’s a lucky person xD), and what I care and don’t care about. I realize this leads me to becoming extremely disappointed in life, and I guess I should work out this flaw. I do know that when I let this go, for around one week, and stopped trying to go after some stuff I was nit-picking, everything fell into place. However, I doubt that will work right now. Sigh.